Hold The Mayo

This week Marie draws like a 1st grader, we hear about recent news alerts, Korean food, civil war gangs and the best jobs to have within, nuclear war, and we realize Trump's hair looks like side of the machine cotton candy. There is also some comb over talk, a puking audience member, we share vomit stories, low fans and hot weather. Then Marie helps Doris clean out her house, Jay explains what a shoe box full of spices are, someone's moving to Florida, someone's driving in Rhode Island, and we're all angry about change.

Direct download: HTM_180.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This week we chat about a very unaware drugged up Elvis, Marie's weekend getaway to Camp Crystal Lake, and the kind of people who purchase mesh bikini's at WalMart. We also discuss our fast food lunch choices, new intentionally confusing menus, and Marie has a giggle fit at what can only be described as the worst dad joke in the history of the world. We also dive face first into celeb meltdowns, Intervention (and why we don't watch it), shout outs, shout ats, summer sausage, and Jay looses his mind about treating dogs like people.

Music By: Story Of The Year, The Big Bopper, Ritchie Vallens, Yellowcard


Direct download: HTM_EP_179.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This week we drop our new updated logo, intro, and fart bombs. We create "Grand Bran" cereal, trash summer sausage, and admit to being grey trash people. Then Jay ponders what would happen if he took children's medicine, why people can't wear white pants, he talks road rage, and bodily functions. Marie attempts to explain periods, the "sex talk" in health class, and weird pancake shapes. We then transition to 90s ballads, Michael Bolton's Ramon Noodle hair, Billy Ray Cyrus's wife, and Brett Michael's playing at a campground to racoon ladies. Actors in wheelchairs are also featured.


Music By: Squeeze , Nelson, Bon Jovi, Sponge, Zorznajiour

Direct download: HTM_EP_178.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This week is started off by talking about 1 horse towns like Old Sturbridge MA, we get a Metal Head Mike update, Jay plays a gross Facebook video and comes up with the term "Korean mud puddle". Then we read the list of celebs that have interacted with our social media accounts (including an emo band and the greatest white NBA player). Marie recants a tale of Legoland, teaching math to a 5 year old, and we debate why legos are cool and Magic the Gathering isn't. Jay talks about his camping weekend, we find out how to become the Executive Producer of Canada, then break down Dropkick Murphy's fans, and give life advice to aggressive townies.



Direct download: HTM_EP_177.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This week Marie acquires a new gang name, BTK blows everyone off for ice cream, and Marie introduces new toilet oils. Jay admits to his coworkers that he has an eating problem, Marie claims that he eats at "gross jaunts", and we find out the best way to watch a pay per view fight for free. Then both Jay and Marie get all fired up about joke thieves, Game of Thrones finale, Mtv VMA's, and the birth of Unplugged. Also some hot doc-talk and band revelations are made.


Music by : Gaslight Anthem , ORION (Jimmy Ellis)



Direct download: HTM_EP_176.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 5:00am EDT

This week we start off with a story about Marie going to Chicago, and all the goings on wit her "adult teen" co-workers. We then talk about Jay's Guitar Center fiasco, deceptive sales pitches, and how most employees lack initiative. Jay also realizes that this is a bad time in the countries history to be bald, and that haircuts in general are weird. Then Marie drops a bomb about her flight home, who she encountered, her exquisite CSI skills. We also find out who the pecker checker is.



Direct download: HTM_EP_175.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 6:00am EDT

This week Marie's lip goes numb from talking about her article being featured on Huffington Post, the TV show she was contacted about, and asking so many questions about Jay's haircut/ going bald. Jay describes why he is self conscious about his hair, what happened this week at the now famous "Ice Cream Lady", why parents are failing their children, and how people should act in public. They also talk about celebs overdosing on drugs, spinning out of control, and of course gummy vitamins.


Direct download: HTM_EP_174.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 6:22am EDT

This week Jay admits to eating ice cream twice in an afternoon, and reveals that his binge eating is getting out of hand. Marie talks about healthy eating and her end game plan for living a better lifestyle. Jay talks about how he ate himself into a bout of depression over the weekend, and what he thinks the contributing factors are. They also talk about some recent documentaries on Netflix, Mtv Classic, and the best/worst music videos from the 80s and 90s.


Direct download: HTM_EP_173.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 6:00am EDT

This week Marie plans to punk her coworkers with a Hooters suggestion, she informs us about her daily gas station trips and the garbage food/ drinks she gets, and why she doesn't give money to charity. Jay explains which 2 pizza places are inedible, which retail chains do not support the troops, and why being on the board of directors for a charity makes you a huge scumbag. They also talk about the 1st day of school, clothes shopping, falling for bad advertising, and why any teens that operate a cash register are garbage people.




Direct download: HTM_EP_172.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 6:00am EDT

This week we recap the Iron Maiden concert, Jay's meeting with Metal Head Mike, Mike's perfectly timed cell phone call, concert traffic, VIP status, and complaining on social media. We also talk about Electric Light Orchestra, 70's perms, pretending to be in popular bands, and wearing sandals in public. We also have a toe nail update, a figure skating foot pain story, and we find out why it's ok to fight high school hockey players and what "ice cream teens" are.

Direct download: HTN_171.mp3
Category:Comedy, general, music, sports -- posted at: 6:00am EDT